Self-Aggrandizement: Quotes Archives

Rough Week
Filed April 2, 2008 12:45 PM.

"If you're going through hell, keep going."
- Winston Churchill

Fundraising
Filed August 31, 2007 2:29 PM.

"Lack of money is the root of all evil."
- George Bernard Shaw

Reinstated
Filed July 30, 2007 6:18 PM.

"I'm always making a comeback but nobody ever tells me where I've been."
- Billie Holiday

Sorry
Filed May 29, 2007 2:59 PM.

"There's one sad truth in life I've found
While journeying east and west -
The only folks we really wound
Are those we love the best.
We flatter those we scarcely know,
We please the fleeting guest,
And deal full many a thoughtless blow
To those who love us best."
-Ella Wheeler Wilcox

Discombobulated Days
Filed April 13, 2007 4:13 PM.

"In times of stress, be bold and valiant."
- Horace

"The man who doesn't relax and hoot a few hoots voluntarily, now and then, is in great danger of hooting hoots and standing on his head for the edification of the pathologist and trained nurse, a little later on."
- Elbert Hubbard

Gone Fishin'
Filed March 4, 2007 10:43 AM.

"How vain it is to sit down to write when you have not stood up to live."
- Thoreau

To Do: Sleep
Filed February 15, 2007 12:43 PM.

"You must sleep some time between lunch and dinner, and no half-way measures. Take off your clothes and get into bed. That's what I always do. Don't think you will be doing less work because you sleep during the day. That's a foolish notion held by people who have no imagination. You will be able to accomplish more. You get two days in one - well, at least one and a half, I'm sure. When the war started, I had to sleep during the day because that was the only way I could cope with my responsibilities."
- Winston Churchill

Today's Quote
Filed January 26, 2007 5:37 PM.

Time management for entrepreneurs:

"You must systematically, agressively divest yourself of those activities you do not do well, do not do happily, or find routine, so as to systematically invest your time (and talent, knowledge, know-how, and other resources) in those things you do extraordionarily well, enjoy doing, and find intellectually stimulating."
- Dan Kennedy

Equally Quotable
Filed January 17, 2007 10:19 AM.

If I'm slinging other people's wisdom today, here's the best business quote I've come across in ages:

"It doesn't matter what your competitors are doing. The only thing that matters is if they are keeping you from getting to your client."
-- Gerry Lemberg (investor in Apple, Intel & Oracle)

Big Ben
Filed January 17, 2007 10:08 AM.

As it's his birthday today:

"If you would not be forgotten as soon as you are dead and rotten,
either write things worth reading, or do things worth the writing. "
- Ben Franklin

Thanksgiving
Filed November 23, 2006 7:00 PM.

"We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures."
- Thornton Wilder

Quote Du Jour
Filed November 16, 2006 2:56 PM.

"Never fuck your hero. It's all downhill from there. "
- Sarah Brown

The Next Oscar Wilde
Filed September 17, 2006 2:15 PM.

"Traditions are like hymens - once they're broken, you're fucked."
- Colin Spoelman

Today's Quote
Filed September 12, 2006 9:12 AM.

"If, after I depart this vale, you ever remember me and have thought to please my ghost, forgive some sinner and wink your eye at some homely girl."
-H.L. Mencken, Epitaph

Oh in Ohio: Press Roundup
Filed July 14, 2006 1:59 PM.

"This nicely naughty indie is full of unexpected pleasures...a feel-good movie about feeling good."
- New York Times

"One of the wittiest and most intoxicating sex comedies to come along in years"
- Oakland Tribune

"It can't help but leave you with a good feeling."
- Los Angeles Daily News

"Posey and Rudd are the real deal."
- LA Weekly

"Danny DeVito steals the show."
- Los Angeles Times

"Hilarious - and in all the appropriate places."
- Ain't It Cool News

"Satire is awfully hard to pull off, but screenwriter Adam Wierzbianski exhibits a flair for it."
- San Francisco Chronicle

"Blithely blurs the line between risqué and raunchy."
- Variety

"Your summer film has finally arrived."
- Cleveland Plain Dealer

Feeling the Love
Filed July 8, 2006 9:22 AM.

Two quotes from the past 24 hours that totally made my week:

"You know today is our three year friend-aversary? That's three wasted years I totally could have spent on someone else."
- Sarah Brown

"Who is this 'Joshua Newman' asshole?"
- Danny DeVito

Today's Quote
Filed June 15, 2006 5:08 PM.

"In New York I feel plugged into a strong alternating current of hope and despair."
- Ted Morgan

How to Carve an Ox
Filed May 15, 2006 10:05 PM.

[An excerpt from the Chuang Tzu]

Cook Ting was cutting up an ox for Lord Wen-hui. At every touch of his hand, every heave of his shoulder, every move of his feet, every thrust of his knee - zip! zoop! He slithered the knife along with a zing, and all was in perfect rhythm, as though he were performing the dance of the Mulberry Grove or keeping time to the Ching-shou music.

"Ah, this is marvelous!" said Lord Wen-hui. "Imagine skill reaching such heights!"

Cook Ting laid down his knife and replied, "What I care about is the Way, which goes beyond skill. When I first began cutting up oxen, all I could see was the ox itself. After three years I no longer saw the whole ox. And now - now I go at it by spirit and don't look with my eyes. Perception and understanding have come to a stop and spirit moves where it wants. I go along with the natural makeup, strike in the big hollows, guide the knife through the big openings, and follow things as they are. So I never touch the smallest ligament or tendon, much less a main joint.

"A good cook changes his knife once a year-because he cuts. A mediocre cook changes his knife once a month-because he hacks. I've had this knife of mine for nineteen years and I've cut up thousands of oxen with it, and yet the blade is as good as though it had just come from the grindstone. There are spaces between the joints, and the blade of the knife has really no thickness into such spaces. There's plenty of room - more than enough for the blade to play about in. That's why after nineteen years the blade of my knife is still as good as when it first came from the grindstone.

"However, whenever I come to a complicated place, I size up the difficulties, tell myself to watch out and be careful, keep my eyes on what I'm doing, work very slowly, and move the knife with the greatest subtlety until - flop! - the whole thing comes apart like a clod of earth crumbling to the ground. I stand there holding the knife and look all around me, completely satisfied and reluctant to move on, and then I wipe off the knife and put it away."

"Excellent!" said Lord Wen-hui. "I have heard the words of Cook Ting and learned how to care for life!"

Passover, Day Six
Filed April 18, 2006 4:48 PM.

"Isn't there any other part of the matzo you can eat?"
- Marilyn Monroe, on being served matzo ball soup three meals in a row.

Also Applies to Life as a Whole
Filed February 21, 2006 9:22 AM.

"The beautiful thing about jazz is that if you say you're playing it well and can get a critic or two to say you're playing it well, and if you look like you're playing it well, enough people will go along with you to make up an audience. The trick is to do it all with a straight face."
- John McNeil

Valuing Friends
Filed December 10, 2005 11:10 AM.

As told by Leo McGarry to Josh Lyman, on The West Wing:

This guy's walking down the street when he falls in a hole. The walls are so steep he can't get out.
A doctor passes by and the guy shouts up, 'Hey you. Can you help me out?' The doctor writes a prescription, throws it down in the hole and moves on.
"Then a priest comes along and the guy shouts up, 'Father, I'm down in this hole can you help me out?' The priest writes out a prayer, throws it down in the hole and moves on.
"Then a friend walks by. 'Hey, Joe, it's me can you help me out?' And the friend jumps in the hole. Our guy says, 'Are you stupid? Now we're both down here.' The friend says, 'Yeah, but I've been down here before and I know the way out.'

Critical Genius
Filed December 8, 2005 1:03 PM.

"An audience is never wrong. An individual member of it may be an imbecile, but a thousand imbeciles together in the dark - that is critical genius."
- Billy Wilder

Useful Wisdom
Filed November 14, 2005 1:02 PM.

From the Talmud, a collection of Jewish writings in the 1st and 2nd century:

Be very careful if you make a woman cry, because God counts her tears. The woman came out of a man’s rib. Not from his feet, to be walked on. Not from his head, to be superior. But from the side, to be equal. Under the arm, to be protected, and next to the heart, to be loved.

Point / Counterpoint
Filed November 8, 2005 11:59 AM.

"We die only once, and for such a long time." - Moliere

"Happiness makes up in height for what it lacks in length." - Robert Frost

Relax
Filed July 27, 2005 12:23 PM.

"A firm defense of quiet material pleasure is the only way to oppose the universal folly of Fast Life."
- Slow Food International Manifesto

The Upside of Not Blogging
Filed July 3, 2005 6:18 PM.

"There are very few people who don't become more interesting when they stop talking." - Mary Lowry

Haiku
Filed March 31, 2005 9:22 AM.

haru tatsu ya
gu no ue ni mata
gu ni kaeru

[spring begins--
more foolishness
for this fool]

- Kobayashi Issa, 1823

Good Tip
Filed March 16, 2005 1:56 PM.

"I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake - which I also keep handy."
- W. C. Fields

a bit like being ceo
Filed February 22, 2005 9:14 AM.

"Upon the king! let us our lives, our souls, Our debts, our careful wives, Our children and our sins lay on the king! We must bear all. O hard condition, Twin-born with greatness, subject to the breath Of every fool, whose sense no more can feel But his own wringing! What infinite heart's-ease Must kings neglect, that private men enjoy!"
- Wm. Shakespeare, in Henry V

today's quote
Filed February 15, 2005 11:06 AM.

"I feel sorry for people who don’t drink or do drugs. Because someday they’re going to be in a hospital bed, dying, and they won’t know why."
- Redd Foxx

exactly
Filed February 13, 2005 10:49 AM.

"If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way."
- Mark Twain

r.i.p.
Filed February 12, 2005 10:28 AM.

"The theater is so endlessly fascinating because it's so accidental. It's so much like life."
-Arthur Miller, 1915-2005.

and also:
Filed January 24, 2005 9:35 AM.

"Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance."
- Oscar Wilde

today's quote
Filed January 24, 2005 9:35 AM.

"Nothing is really work unless you would rather be doing something else."
- J.M. Barrie

today's quote
Filed January 16, 2005 8:50 AM.

"I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean."
- G. K. Chesterton

quotable
Filed November 22, 2004 8:31 PM.

"Ambition is to the mind what the cap is to the falcon; it blinds us first, then compels us to tower by reason of our blindness."
- Charles Caleb Colton

counterpoint
Filed October 15, 2004 11:22 AM.

Balancing that previous wide-eyedly optimistic post:

"Anyone committing himself to his calling has volunteered for hell, whether he knows it or not. He will be dining for the duration on a diet of isolation, rejection, self-doubt, despair, ridicule, contempt, and humiliation. He has to know how to be miserable. He has to love being miserable... Because this is war, baby. And war is hell."
- Successful novelist and screenwriter Steven Pressfield

today's quote
Filed October 7, 2004 8:56 AM.

"Vision is not enough; it must be combined with venture. It is not enough to stare up the steps; we must step up the stairs."
- Vaclav Havel

quote of the day
Filed August 18, 2004 11:42 PM.

"The only thing more unpalatable than a logophile is perhaps one who types."
- The inimitable Vic Sarjoo, in response to my earlier repartee.

today's poem
Filed June 30, 2004 11:40 AM.

On Being Twenty-Six
by Philip Larkin

I feared these present years,
The middle twenties,
When deftness disappears,
And each event is
Freighted with a source-encrusting doubt,
And turned to drought.

I thought: this pristine drive
Is sure to flag
At twenty-four or -five;
And now the slag
Of burnt-out childhood proves that I was right.
What caught alight

Quickly consumed in me,
As I foresaw.
Talent, felicity —
These things withdraw,
And are succeeded by a dingier crop
That come to stop;

Or else, certainly gone,
Perhaps the rest,
Tarnishing, linger on
As second-best.
Fabric of fallen minarets is trash.
And in the ash

Of what has pleased and passed
Is now no more
Than struts of greed, a last
Charred smile, a clawed
Crustacean hatred, blackened pride – of such
I once made much.

And so, if I were sure
I have no chance
To catch again that pure
Unnoticed stance,
I would calcine the outworn properties,
Live on what is.

But it dies hard, that world;
Or, being dead,
Putrescently is pearled,
For I, misled,
Make on my mind the deepest wound of all:
Think to recall

At any moment, states
Long since dispersed;
That if chance dissipates
The best, the worst
May scatter equally upon a touch.
I kiss, I clutch,

Like a daft mother, putrid
Infancy,
That can and will forbid
All grist to me
Except devaluing dichotomies:
Nothing, and paradise.

fits to a t
Filed June 18, 2004 9:56 AM.

“When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy.”
– Dave Barry

today's quote
Filed May 20, 2004 11:37 AM.

"Living at risk is jumping off the cliff and building your wings on the way down”
- Ray Bradbury

[Thanks mom!]

today's quote
Filed May 13, 2004 10:47 AM.

"Jazz from people without a heroin problem isn't that good."
-Liz Winstead.

also applies to blogs?
Filed April 5, 2004 12:05 AM.

"It's the good girls who keep diaries; the bad girls never have the time."
- Tallulah Bankhead

the secret of my success
Filed February 5, 2004 11:48 AM.

"If you want to get into the movie business but you don't have any special talent or ability, become a producer."
- Monster producer Clark Peterson

today's quote
Filed February 4, 2004 10:22 AM.

"Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment."
- Robert Benchley

daily quote
Filed January 25, 2004 7:47 PM.

"A little nonsense now and then, is cherished by the wisest men."
- Roald Dahl

listen here
Filed November 12, 2003 7:47 PM.

"People are always telling me their life stories and they always tell me they have done so because I am a good listener. In fact I am a terrible listener, I don’t listen to a word: what I am doing is looking like I am listening while concentrating all my energy on not listening, on finding some refuge beyond what is being said. It is easy to be a good listener in America: all you have to do is not interrupt and it is easy not to interrupt when you are not paying attention."
—Geoff Dyer

like, dig
Filed November 11, 2003 10:31 AM.

"Finally Monk said to him, 'You know, that note is wrong.' [Tenor saxophonist Paul] Jeffrey said, 'Monk, why didn’t you tell me during these months?' Monk said, 'Well, sometimes I like to hear a guy play wrong shit.'”
- from Straight, No Chaser: The Life and Genius of Thelonious Monk

daily quote (re: inebriation)
Filed August 24, 2003 10:53 AM.

"Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life."
- George Bernard Shaw

"It is a maudlin and indecent verity that comes out through the strength of wine."
- Joseph Conrad

"I only drink to steady my nerves. Sometimes I'm so steady, I don't move for months."
- WC Fields

"It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues."
- Abe Lincoln

"O thou invisible spirit of wine, if thou hast no name to be known by, let us call thee devil."
- William Shakespeare

daily quote (re: booty)
Filed August 22, 2003 12:37 PM.

"Sex is like money; only too much is enough."
- John Updike

"Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go it's one of the best."
- Woody Allen

daily quote (point, counterpoint)
Filed August 21, 2003 10:21 AM.

"Never give in, never, never, never."
- Winston Churchill

"If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it."
- W. C. Fields

daily quotes, explained
Filed August 19, 2003 6:10 PM.

"I quote others only in order the better to express myself."
- Michel de Montaigne

"By necessity, by proclivity, and by delight, we all quote. In fact, it is as difficult to appropriate the thoughts of others as it is to invent."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit."
- W. Somerset Maugham

daily quote
Filed August 18, 2003 9:55 AM.

"The kiss originated when the first male reptile licked the first female reptile, implying in a subtle, complimentary way that she was as succulent as the small reptile he had for dinner the night before."
- F. Scott Fitzgerald

daily quote
Filed August 17, 2003 12:39 PM.

"The intellect is not a serious thing, and never has been. It is an instrument on which one plays, that is all."
- Oscar Wilde

alcoholism explained
Filed August 3, 2003 11:17 PM.

"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools" - Hemingway

busy playing
Filed July 30, 2003 10:19 PM.

"What work I have done I have done because it has been play. If it had been work I shouldn't have done it." - Mark Twain

Rough Week Filed April 2, 2008 12:45 PM.

Fundraising Filed August 31, 2007 2:29 PM.

Reinstated Filed July 30, 2007 6:18 PM.

Sorry Filed May 29, 2007 2:59 PM.

Discombobulated Days Filed April 13, 2007 4:13 PM.

Gone Fishin' Filed March 4, 2007 10:43 AM.

To Do: Sleep Filed February 15, 2007 12:43 PM.

Today's Quote Filed January 26, 2007 5:37 PM.

Equally Quotable Filed January 17, 2007 10:19 AM.

Big Ben Filed January 17, 2007 10:08 AM.

Thanksgiving Filed November 23, 2006 7:00 PM.

Quote Du Jour Filed November 16, 2006 2:56 PM.

The Next Oscar Wilde Filed September 17, 2006 2:15 PM.

Today's Quote Filed September 12, 2006 9:12 AM.

Oh in Ohio: Press Roundup Filed July 14, 2006 1:59 PM.

Feeling the Love Filed July 8, 2006 9:22 AM.

Today's Quote Filed June 15, 2006 5:08 PM.

How to Carve an Ox Filed May 15, 2006 10:05 PM.

Passover, Day Six Filed April 18, 2006 4:48 PM.

Also Applies to Life as a Whole Filed February 21, 2006 9:22 AM.

Valuing Friends Filed December 10, 2005 11:10 AM.

Critical Genius Filed December 8, 2005 1:03 PM.

Useful Wisdom Filed November 14, 2005 1:02 PM.

Point / Counterpoint Filed November 8, 2005 11:59 AM.

Relax Filed July 27, 2005 12:23 PM.

The Upside of Not Blogging Filed July 3, 2005 6:18 PM.

Haiku Filed March 31, 2005 9:22 AM.

Good Tip Filed March 16, 2005 1:56 PM.

a bit like being ceo Filed February 22, 2005 9:14 AM.

today's quote Filed February 15, 2005 11:06 AM.

exactly Filed February 13, 2005 10:49 AM.

r.i.p. Filed February 12, 2005 10:28 AM.

and also: Filed January 24, 2005 9:35 AM.

today's quote Filed January 24, 2005 9:35 AM.

today's quote Filed January 16, 2005 8:50 AM.

quotable Filed November 22, 2004 8:31 PM.

counterpoint Filed October 15, 2004 11:22 AM.

today's quote Filed October 7, 2004 8:56 AM.

quote of the day Filed August 18, 2004 11:42 PM.

today's poem Filed June 30, 2004 11:40 AM.

fits to a t Filed June 18, 2004 9:56 AM.

today's quote Filed May 20, 2004 11:37 AM.

today's quote Filed May 13, 2004 10:47 AM.

also applies to blogs? Filed April 5, 2004 12:05 AM.

the secret of my success Filed February 5, 2004 11:48 AM.

today's quote Filed February 4, 2004 10:22 AM.

daily quote Filed January 25, 2004 7:47 PM.

listen here Filed November 12, 2003 7:47 PM.

like, dig Filed November 11, 2003 10:31 AM.

daily quote (re: inebriation) Filed August 24, 2003 10:53 AM.

daily quote (re: booty) Filed August 22, 2003 12:37 PM.

daily quote (point, counterpoint) Filed August 21, 2003 10:21 AM.

daily quotes, explained Filed August 19, 2003 6:10 PM.

daily quote Filed August 18, 2003 9:55 AM.

daily quote Filed August 17, 2003 12:39 PM.

alcoholism explained Filed August 3, 2003 11:17 PM.

busy playing Filed July 30, 2003 10:19 PM.