Self-Aggrandizement: Laugh Du Jour

The bookkeeper is deaf, which the Godfather considered an occupational benefit, as not hearing privileged side-conversations would keep him from ever testifying in court.

The Godfather goes to shake down the bookkeeper about the missing $10 million, and brings along his attorney, who knows sign language.

"Where is the ten million bucks you stole from me?" the Godfather asks.

The attorney, using sign language, asks the bookkeeper where the ten million dollars is hidden.

The bookkeeper signs back: "I don't know what you are talking about."

"He says he doesn't know what you're talking about," the attorney translates.

The Godfather pulls out a 9mm pistol, puts it to the bookkeeper's temple, cocks it, and says: "Ask him again!"

The attorney signs to the underling: "He'll kill you for sure if you don't tell him!"

"Okay! You win!" the bookeeper signs back. "The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed in my cousin Enzo's backyard in Queens!"

"Well, what'd he say?" the Godfather asks the attorney.

"He says," the attorney replies, "you don't have the balls to pull the trigger."

[Special thanks to David Greenberg, who narrowly avoided becoming a lawyer himself, for the joke.]

Laugh Du Jour Filed Monday, July 11 2005.

Laugh Du Jour
Filed Monday, July 11 2005.