Self-Aggrandizement: In Brief

About three years back, I observed that men are loath to part with beloved clothing items: sweaters, jeans, t-shirts, and - particularly - underwear. Given a trusty pair of boxers, I said, "we'll keep washing and wearing... until it's disintegrated to nothing more than a waistband and a few hanging threads."

And while, fortunately, my own have not yet reached that state, they are undoubtedly looking rather rough around the edges. (Literally. One of the first things to go, it seems, is the waistband elastic.)

So, this past weekend, I set out shopping. By broad female consensus, boxer briefs remained the only suitable way to go. But, for reasons I've never quite discerned, nearly every designer - including my own long-preferred Calvin Klein - seems to sell their pairs in only black, navy and heather gray.

On my way to a department store, however, I stopped to pick up a hard drive I had lent to a friend some months back. And, next door to his office, I noticed Gap holding its REALLY BIG SALE. (Capitalization theirs.) With some time to kill, and my mind in shopping mode, I decided to pop inside.

Lo and behold, Gap, of all places, had somehow veered away from the tri-color hegemony. Even better, they had reshaped their boxer briefs' cut, away from what previously looked like foreshortened long underwear to a much hipper 'athletic square cut'. And, best of all, the sale took the price per pair to a scant $6.99

So, now, my underwear drawer has, once again, been wholesale refreshed, au courant with an array of stripes, primary colors, and even one pair emblazoned with little green alligators knit right into the fabric.

I've previously admitted my belief in lucky underwear, and can therefore say I'm particularly excited to discover the effects of that alligatored pair.

They look auspicious indeed.

In Brief Filed Monday, April 17 2006.

In Brief
Filed Monday, April 17 2006.