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Sucker
Filed Monday, March 27 2006.

Put me on any flight longer than three hours, and, somewhere along the way, I'll read the Sky Mall Catalogue cover to cover.

I've been doing so for at least a decade. And, in all that time, I've never actually purchased anything from it.

I do the same with a handful of other catalogues: Crate and Barrel, Herrington, Design Within Reach. When they appear in my mailbox, I can't help but thumb my way through, will even dog-ear a page here and there, as if to convince myself that maybe, this time, despite years and years of uninterrupted experience to the contrary, I'll actually whip out a credit card and put in and order.

And It isn't just catalogues. Back before I killed my television, if I surfed past an infomercial - be it for ginsu knives, vacuum cleaners or ab machines - I'd inevitably watch it, transfixed, the rest of the way through.

I don't know why I do, nor why I derive pleasure from simply considering without actually purchasing. But, given the number of flights I take each year, not buying any of those lusted-after Sky Mall items has doubtless already saved me thousands upon thousands of dollars.

So, when I finally do call in to order the indoor electric-powered waterfall fountain, I figure I'm totally, completely justified in buying the really, really big one.